Learning to live for HIS glory

Some REAL moments from November. 5~Jesus, thank You for being all for me so I can be free to be weak and ordinary...free to fail. 7~I hurt cause I'm wondering why. Why did this have to even happen in the first place. I know...sin. But oh the world just feels so dark and bleak. I'm trying to make sense of it all and honestly struggling. You are what is right and true. Jesus, I need You. Cut through this darkness with Your light. Please? Help. Hurting. Need Your grace! 8~There is hope despite the mourning. I think I can write in pink again. 12~Instead of dreading being in a freshman class that could mostly be 5 years younger than me, I feel like I've been given a bit of a vision for what kind of ministry that could be. Thank You! And as I think about that, Lord, I feel like this is key: Would You give me SUCH a joy in my singleness . . . It's like those freshman girls are all so involved in this drama of finding an “MRS. Degree.” I wan...

"If the foundations are destroyed, what can the righteous do?" (Ps. 11:3) Gunmen, Bombings, People hacked to pieces, Images of blood, Buildings burned. "The way of peace they do not know, and there is no justice in their paths." (Is. 59:8) Text messages. 3 hour phone calls. Tears. Silence. Song. "Justice is turned back, and righteousness stands far away; for truth has stumbled in the public squares, and uprightness cannot enter." (Is. 59:14). Conversation in the chairs out back... Tears welling up. Heart weighed down, Too heavy. Wondering, God, WHY?! "They were filled with all manner of unrighteousness, evil, covetousness, malice..." (Rom. 1:29) So much darkness, Evil at every turn. My heart weighs down To the point of breaking. I NEED Goodness, Love, Justice, Truth, Purity, So HUNGRY... I turn to One who is... GOOD. "For the Lord is righteous; He loves righteous deeds; the upright shall behold His ...

Tidbits from September's thoughts . . . 3~Guard me from wanting the gifts for their own sake, or loving them for their own sake, and instead ignite by Your Holy Spirit a deeper desire and love for You! Thank You for entering into covenant with me, Lord! 12~Making pleasing people my god is soo exhausting!  Thank You for saving me from having to be enslaved to that!  I pray You would give me the courage, humility, and graciousness to live for You alone . . . remind me I don’t have to make everyone happy.  In fact, if I’m living for You, I’ll probably make some people mad.  But Lord, I pray You would fill me with Your Spirit’s grace and love to such a point that my only offense would be the gospel! 14~Honestly just so many thoughts running through my head right now.  You have placed the capability to dream within me, and yet I don’t want to let a good thing become a bad thing by letting it run away with me! Lord, the burdens of family, friends, and...

Bits and pieces of my writings from February of last year: 5~Lord, I want to be a woman “who lives for God and His will; whose whole being is pervaded and ruled by the glory of God; who unknowingly and unceasingly leads others to think of God. A [wo]man in whose heart and life God has taken the right place as the All in All, and a [wo]man who has only one desire, that God should have His rightful place throughout the world.”~Andrew Murray 6~I need Your strength, Lord, for I am weak.  This body has been put on earth for the purpose of glorifying You.  I pray that You would fill it with strength so that it can better do that and better love others the way You have called me to. 10~Wow…I have a whole new year of life ahead of me, with no mistakes in it yet! . . . Well, actually it might have a mistake or two in it already, but I thank You for Your grace.  Grace…how wonderful it is! 11~Lord, with each passing year I think again…maybe this will be the year....

Us 9, plus 1.  The subjects needed, but in some ways dreaded.  Thankful, yet unsure of the next steps.  Change coming is always hard . . . regardless of whether good or bad.  This is good change.  Yet hard.  Selfish hearts would have things stay the same, stay comfortable and familiar.  But growth brings change, and change brings growth, and growth is good. At times the air felt tense and warm.  Heated debates?  Eh, a bit.  Much was talked through, not alot decided on.  At the end of it all, weary heads bowed to pray.  Our hearts poured out before the Lord, tensions eased away.  We told Him of our problems, thanked Him for our blessings, and then the perfect words came . . . "Thank You for Jesus."  Yes.  This is where we needed to end.  Thankful for His love and sacrifice.  Reminded of what life's all about.  

To sit with someone you love as they cry and not have the ability to do anything about the situation that causes the tears, or to hear a beloved voice on the phone break with emotion and not be able to reach out and hug them . . . these must be some of the most difficult situations a person can face.  I know for me they're painful.  This life is filled with burdens, and sometimes they heap up on us till we feel like we're drowning.  Some moments are just hard, sometimes the right words are completely elusive, and often times prayer is all we can offer.  When I start to think like that, I must remind myself that prayer is the most powerful thing we can offer!  Prayer taps into the power of the Almighty God who is ever faithful, created this world, loves perfectly, and raises people from the dead!  His is the power that can change a situation, and use everything for good in the lives of those who love Him. And in those moments when the burdens feel to heavy ...